||The key to moving on from the pain and loss is awareness and understanding|
alone with my pain. I was
hounded by guilt,
and couldn’t tell anyone. Who would understand?”
grief is not like other griefs.
It is harder to talk about,
Remember, everyone's experience is
Whatever you are feeling is okay and normal.
You may find it hard if you expected things
to settle or to go back to the way they were before all this happened
and they haven't. It can be a difficult and confusing time soon after
abortion experience with the build up, decision-making, going through
the procedure and wondering now what?
Going from being pregnant to not pregnant can mean some
hormonal and biological changes. There may be a mix of thoughts and
feelings. If there were uncertainties around the
decision, different pressures or influences.... it can be hard to make
sense of these now.
In any case your experience is likely to
involve grief, as you adjust to the losses and changes from the whole
situation around the abortion and the abortion itself.
How do I know if I am experiencing grief after my abortion?
- feeling numb or in shock, or sad and
- unable to turn off thoughts and feelings
- continually focusing on the abortion, or
telling myself to just get over it
- find it hard to talk about what happened
- going over lots of "what ifs" repeatedly
- problems eating, sleeping, concentrating or doing usual tasks
- greater anger and impatience
- self-medicating, greater risk taking or
activities to escape unbearable feelings
If you are experiencing some of the above reactions, or those
in the Post
Abortion Grief Checklist, you may be affected by your
abortion more than you realise.
What is the hardest thing for you
What is it that you are needing?
You might try How to Help Myself for ways to manage distressing feelings.
And because invariably healing
happens in relationship, being able
to share our grief with someone who cares and whom we can trust is
often beneficial. Go to Counselling
you would like to connect with someone for support. Being able to talk
about your experience and express the emotions around it may help.
if you have a story you would
like to share email us at firstname.lastname@example.org
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